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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25661992">Leaves</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/cagallilenne/pseuds/cagallilenne'>cagallilenne</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Compilation of Final Fantasy VII, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children, Final Fantasy X</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Acupuncture, Depression, F/M, Gen, Healing</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-01</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 03:15:36</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,616</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25661992</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/cagallilenne/pseuds/cagallilenne</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Wounded healers heal best. Tired of the unending cycle of loneliness and emptiness, Tifa gives up 7th Heaven to find her own redemption. Little did she know that the very hands that brought destruction for the good of the Planet would be the very same hands that could bring peace and healing to others...through special needles. And she would have to start with her and with those closest to her. Post-Advent Children. [Warning: acupuncture theories abound. Trypanophobias beware.]</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Tifa Lockhart/Cloud Strife</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Cloud and Tifa</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Leaves</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of Square Enix. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any previously copyrighted material. No copyright infringement is intended and no money is made out of this creative work. </p><p>Warnings: Discussion of depression and acupuncture.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>It all began with a sprained ankle.</p><p>It was ironic to think that Tifa Lockhart, one of the strongest defenders of Gaia, would be literally and figuratively brought to her knees by a very simple injury. She was no stranger to physical wounds, cuts, bleeding, and bodily trauma and even excruciating pain and loss of consciousness was a familiar experience. But in a post-Meteorfall world when there was less reason to inflict damage upon others and even lesser reason to engage in battle – whether human or monster – even the greatest heroes on the Planet was not exempt from unfortunate accidents…and a rather painful one at that.</p><p>
  <em>Painfully stupid. </em>
</p><p>She had been cleaning out the top shelves in the pantry, checking the preserved food and dried goods stocked there. Rarely did she have the time to properly clean the shelves and do a thorough cleaning of the pantry. So once Barret had offered to take Marlene and Denzel to Corel during the weekend, she had set her mind to finally doing the much needed cleaning to take her mind off of recent events.</p><p>So perched on top of the ladder, she went through each bottle and jar on the top shelf. Open, look, smell, close, wipe, re-position, repeat. Expired and unusable items were subject to a different process and dropped unceremoniously into the trash bin right under the ladder. Thirty minutes into her task, she had realized the extent of how much cleaning she had to do, with random food and miscellaneous items shoved up the upper shelf to be stored and retrieved any time if needed. <em>Very much like her own feelings, bottled up and left to fester in the dark corners of her heart, </em>she thought bitterly<em>. Accessible but very painful to retrieve. </em></p><p>Two years – no, almost two decades – had been too short of a time to grieve and recover from a quarter of a lifetime riddled with loss and tragedy. Any time spent on dwelling on it would mean time lost to act, but all the grief, rage, sadness was there, tucked away and locked up in a dense ball of confusing emotion and memory. For Tifa, holding on to the hatred had been easier to fuel the desire to fight and live on then but the relative peace that followed Sephiroth’s first and second defeat left her nothing to hold on to but the amalgamation of complex emotions and feelings. And it was even more aggravated by the deafening emptiness of the house and the loneliness of the past days. <em>Will this be all that there will ever be?  </em></p><p>The sound of porcelain breaking brought back her attention to the present. Tifa had been so lost in her thoughts that she had dropped a vase that had been holding. <em>Like me, a broken, beautiful mess</em>, she contemplated, surveying the shards littering the floor. It was then that she noticed an object that it almost appeared to blend in with the faded wooden boards of the floor, something that had dried up a long time ago but was still there. Nestled under fragments of blue and white lay a small, withered flower, its petals the color of parchment and held together by a brown and hardened stem. <em>Could that be? </em></p>
<hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“Where’d you get that? I can’t remember the last time I saw a real one.”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Tifa pointed to the yellow flower tucked into the strap of Cloud’s armor. Fresh flowers in Midgar were a very rare occurrence, even more so for this variant of daffodil which would not thrive in this polluted city. Instead of answering, he removed it in one swift motion and confidently offered to her. She took it shyly, glancing between the flower and Cloud.</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“How sweet. When did you get so thoughtful?”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“A guy can change,” he said assertively, but refused to look her in the eye, instead turning to look elsewhere. A familiarity of the bashful childhood friend she knew back in Nibelheim. “Has been five years.”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Five? Wasn’t it…seven? </em>
  </strong>
</p>
<hr/><p>“Huh?”</p><p>Impossible, but it was unmistakable. Surely, it must have been kept up on the shelf for quite some time since its pastel yellow had long since faded but not long enough to have disintegrated into dust. But why would one of Aerith’s daffodils be here of all places? An image of the sweet flower girl’s smile flooded Tifa’s vision before disintegrating into a blur of tears. <em>One of the reasons for still living, but also one of the reasons for breaking –</em></p><p>A quick step and the weight of her foot on a weak rung sent her immediately hurtling to the floor. Instinct had her immediately raise her arms to brace her head on impact, but she did not act quickly enough to prevent her ankle from twisting upon landing awkwardly on her right foot. <em>Shit. </em>It took quite some time from her to recover and process what had happened after she drew herself up to sit up against one of the cabinets. Panting heavily, she laughed at the irony of her situation and her predicament. She couldn’t recall the last time she had a really good laugh in the past two years. But her hollow laugh only resonated within the empty room until it transformed into something heavier and darker. Through her tears, she glanced at the debris around her and spotted the flower on the floor within an arm’s reach. She brushed off the pieces of porcelain and gingerly picked it up, remembering the fragility of life itself and the bittersweet memory of a friend so dearly missed but so very much alive. To this, her walls of defense – the very same ones that helped her appear and stay strong and optimistic in times of adversity – crumbled and she let loose years of pent-up emotion until there was nothing but raw and unadulterated numbness.</p><p>The throbbing pain of her sprained ankle served as her reminder to finally deal with the present. <em>No matter, after this it will be back to the happy, optimistic Tifa.  </em>Wiping away the tears and brushing the debris from her clothes, she limped to the nearby bathroom, grabbing an ice pack from the refrigerator along the way. She retrieved and pocketed the bottle of painkillers and made quick work of wrapping an elastic bandage to stabilize the injured ankle. Once set, she made her way to the kitchen, downed a tablet with water, and reached out for her PHS. As much as she didn’t want to, she couldn’t do anything on her own with a sprain.<em> Alone, I don’t know what I could do. </em></p><p>“Hello, Barret? Sorry to cut your time short with the kids, but I…I may need your help.”</p>
<hr/><p>The road to recovering from a simple injury was a long one. For one, the medical consultations and modern medicines cost a hefty Gil, a commonality between pre-Meteorfall and post-Meteorfall life for the residents in the city. The WRO could do nothing about the powerful oligarchs who still monopolized the health care system – or whatever was left of it. Stocks of medicine were still in their disposal, while limited power supply and blockages restricted the use of old medical equipment and facilities. Doctors and medical workers that remained were either absorbed into the WRO for research or voluntarily deployed to far-flung areas and villages. Low supply of both medicine and health workers drove healthcare prices extremely high, and the inequality was further aggregated with the outbreak of the Geostigma pandemic. Rich citizens could access the private facilities, while those with little Gil had no choice but to seek help from the overcrowded public care centers that the WRO managed. The meager healthcare system would have collapsed had the healing rains did not come, but many were still afflicted with the disease and had yet to be given proper treatment in the still-crowded public facilities.</p><p>With this in mind, Tifa refused to have her ankle checked for practical reasons and the sensibility that others would need immediate medical attention more than her. The easy way would have been to use materia to cure the injury within seconds, but artificial materia was rare because Mako was no longer used. The only materia they had was left in Cloud’s care since he needed it more for his travels, but even that was used sparingly to avoid drawing too much energy from the lifestream. So the only option for Tifa was to allow the normal healing process to take place, which meant closing down the bar for two weeks and actually resting.</p><p>For someone who was very active and on her feet for most of the day, the sudden disruption of her routine made her agitated and restless. Barret took over managing the household after announcing his urgent leave to the WRO (<em>“Nah, I insist! You’ve been doin’ nothin’ but taking care of my little girl, ‘bout time I did that fo’ you!”</em>) while Denzel and Marlene did their best to make her as comfortable as possible and helped out with the cooking, cleaning, and the laundry. But by the end of the first week her nerves were getting the better of her and the children could sense that she was unhappy. Tifa blamed herself for letting them worry about her and for her carelessness that led to her situation in the first place. And the healing process was taking so painfully slow.</p><p>“Spiky ain’t called yet?”</p><p>The low grumble of a threat caused Tifa to jump in her seat. It was a topic she had wanted to avoid since Barret and the children came back. He joined her on the adjoining seat to the coach, offering her a glass of water he filled in the kitchen.</p><p>“No,” she said. <em>There hadn’t been any news from Cloud since last week. Since he left after their celebration of the defeat of Sephiroth and his remnants. Since their conversation about forgiveness.</em></p>
<hr/><p>
  <strong>
    <em>The ruckus and the stifling heat in the bar had been too much for both Tifa and Cloud, who had found the sudden reunion of friends comforting but overwhelming. It reminded them of the old times when they had to make each moment count because it was a matter of life and death. But it also reminded them of those who also weren’t there to celebrate with them.</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>So they found themselves sitting next to each other on the top of the roof, gazing up at the stars in heavy silence. </em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“I feel lighter,” Cloud started. “But I also feel terrible, like there’s still a weight on my chest.”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>His admission drew no response from Tifa. He sensed her hesitancy and unwillingness to speak, the walls of her strong façade still there. </em>
  </strong>
  <em>How long ago had it been since he left?<strong> For Tifa, it had felt like ages since their last genuine conversation. Ages since he last reached out. His relaxed state of inebriation seemed to contribute to his sudden openness. </strong></em>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>He explained, “You’re right. I was scared.” His breath hitched. “I was scared to lose you, Denzel, and Marlene. Living together…as a family, I could lose you anytime.”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <em>But families don’t leave each other. They stay together. <strong>She wanted to burst into tears, pound into his chest, and demand why. But an emotional outburst could push him away during his moment of vulnerability, so Tifa decided against it.</strong></em>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“If I had to die, I wanted it to be alone…so you, Denzel, and Marlene didn’t have to carry my burden.”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>The lump in her throat grew larger as she tried to process what Cloud was saying. Tears brimming in her eyes, she finally forced herself to look at her childhood friend, so broken that he was willing to die alone. So broken that even if she could help him piece himself together again like that time in the lifestream, he would still break. And even if she did it again and again, he would still be the same, broken Cloud. And she would still be the same Tifa, as broken as him, but still holding, holding on…</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“Cloud…” her voice cracked. </em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>He continued, perhaps because this may be the only chance he could muster enough courage to say what he felt. “More than anything, I had wanted to be forgiven. But after all we’ve been through, I think…I have only started to forgive myself.” </em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>He buried his face in his hands and Tifa felt all her anger melt away. For all the times that Cloud could not express himself, he had summed up what she had been trying to come to terms with ever since her mother died. She understood that feeling of guilt gnawing away at the pit of her stomach everyday, the endless nights of insomnia, the diminished interest to live and concentrate, and the feeling of worthlessness. But she also understood that it wouldn’t go away on its own. He still needed someone to lean on. </em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>She brought herself to kneel next to him and tentatively laid her hands on his, unsure if her touch would be welcome. But he stilled a moment and then grasped both tenderly, and without looking up he begged, “Will you forgive me too?”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Too much time and too much distance. Shoving her fear and timidity aside, she gathered enough courage to draw him into a tight embrace and cried. Cried because of everything they’ve been through. Cried because even the temporary comfort from friends with the same wounds of the past wouldn’t be enough. Cried because all along, they had both been lonely: Cloud a matter of choice and Tifa a matter of circumstance. </em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Cloud returned her embrace as if all the unspoken words could make everything right. After a while, Tifa let him go but Cloud momentarily tightened his grip on her. “Cloud, you’re hurting me.” An all too familiar feeling. </em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>He released her and finally lifted his eyes to meet hers. She smiled weakly and whispered, “I think…we both need to forgive ourselves.” She returned to her original position next to him. The silence wore on until she finally shared her own admission, “Back then, I thought that the only way to be forgiven was to live. And now, I realize that living is not enough. It needs meaning.”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Cloud nodded in agreement, cerulean eyes still seeking for an answer in carmine ones. She had to say this or forever be trapped with the what-ifs. </em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“When we rebuilt Seventh Heaven, I thought that maybe we can also rebuilt the home we lost in Sector 7. Barret said that it was one of the ways we can pay back for our sins. But I realized –” she paused and searched for a way to coherently express her thoughts. “Being here is a constant reminder of the old times, of Avalanche, and of something we can never get back.” Alcohol they served and downed had only numbed the feelings and memories, but they were still there. “I think…I want to live…move on from those memories. Maybe settle in a village somewhere or go back to study.”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“…what about Denzel and Marlene?” And the unspoken question about Cloud.</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>Tifa thought about that. “I’ll ask the kids what they think and want to do…what do you want to do?” </em>
  </strong>
  <em>More like, what will you do?</em>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>He broke their eye contact and realization hit him hard. Here was the woman who had always been there for him. A solid pillar of strength to draw from. His only living link to the past and present. But now, it was like she was saying goodbye and letting go.</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“I don’t know. We’ve always been together.” </em>
  </strong>
  <em>But never with each other. <strong>But if Cloud would ask something, anymore from her, she would still give in even if it meant staying in Edge.</strong></em>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>“Maybe…we can start a new life. One where there aren’t any promises anymore. No expectations. No what-ifs. Just…live.”</em>
  </strong>
</p><p>
  <strong>
    <em>He just smiled. </em>
  </strong>
</p>
<hr/><p>The following day, he was gone and left a simple text message:</p><p>✆<em><span class="u">Cloud</span>: Going away for a while but will be back.</em></p><p>Tifa had expected that Cloud would leave again without much explanation but it still left her upset even if his effort to leave a message gave some consolation. She had to inform customers that Strife Delivery Service could no longer be accessible through the phone number in Seventh Heaven and any requests or concerns about deliveries had to be channeled to Cloud’s PHS. Every call reminded her of his absence but also her impending decision to move on.</p><p>“Damn him,” Barret’s cursing interrupted her thoughts. “Jes ‘cus Spiky saved the world again don’t mean he can go back to shuttin’ us out again. Normal friends don’t do nuthin’ like that.” <em>When were we ever normal? </em>  </p><p>“I think he needs some time, Barret. We all do.”</p><p>He huffed with indignation. “This is a family. We supposed to be there fo’ each other through thick ‘n’ thin.” The last sentence left him guilty. Where was he when Tifa was taking care of Marlene? “Ain’t being fair to ya,” he apologized.</p><p>“Maybe...”</p><p>They sat in silence, watching the television before them. News from different villages and cities were being featured in the program and a shot of the marketplace in Kalm popped up on screen. “Since the Healing Rains, people and businesses are gradually coming back to normal.” Another shot of Kalm residents filtering in and out of the plaza. “While the WRO cannot guarantee when a vaccine or treatment will be in place for those who still have Geostigma, things are looking bright for the people in Kalm as they face a new normal.” <em>That’s certainly new. </em></p><p>“How ya feelin’?”</p><p>If it had been asked on a different day, Tifa would have shrugged it off with a simple “Okay” or “Fine”. But there would be no use delaying the inevitable. She had to be honest to herself, to Barret, and to the kids and that would take a whole lot of courage. So she settled with five words: “I want to start again.”</p><p> “Whaddya mean you wanna start again? You got me ‘n’ Marlene ‘n’ Denzel. You got Seventh Heaven!”</p><p> “Remember back then…when you said we’ll live on until we pay back for our sins?”</p><p>He nodded.</p><p>“I don’t think this is the only way,” she confessed. “At least for me.”</p><p>His mouth opened in response, and then closed. Brows furrowed but his voice softened. “Awww ‘Teef, didn’ know you felt that way. Why didn’ you tell us?”</p><p>She sank further into the pillows and resigned herself to stare up at the ceiling. “I guess I didn’t want to be selfish. Marlene seemed so happy to be in Seventh Heaven again and you and Cloud wanted to give it a try. But if I was really honest…” <em>And she had been denying it for so long. </em>“I think it reminds me too much of the past. I think I’d like to travel or to live in a village or a small town. You know, maybe take my own journey.”</p><p>Understanding dawned upon him. Maybe it had all been for his comfort. A physical reminder of their old home, to be visited only when he wanted to. “Shit, ‘Teef. I keep forgetting you was twenty two…I figured you were happy here but looks like I was wrong.” He paused for a while. “So where’d ya wanna go?”</p><p><em>I don’t know. </em>She was about to reply when the shrill ring from her PHS interrupted her. Retrieving it from her pocket, she pushed a button to welcome a familiar voice.</p><p>“Hi Reeve.”</p><p>“Tifa. How are you? I hope you aren’t too busy.”</p><p>“Not at all.” She glanced down at her foot. “What do you need?”</p><p>“I’ll get straight to the point. WRO is trying its best to stop the pandemic for the longest time, but we’re only making strides recently. We’re looking for people to rely on. I wanted to take the chance to ask if you are interested in working with the WRO in the frontlines.”</p><p>
  <em>Frontlines? This would be a different war than they were used to. How can a martial artist and bar manager possibly help? </em>
</p><p>“Let me explain further,” Reeve continued as if reading her thoughts. “Two years ago, the WRO unearthed centuries-old scrolls and texts from the Temple of the Ancients that document an ancient healing system. While Elder Hargo, Elder Bughe, and other Cosmo Canyon scholars have been able to interpret and rewrite the majority of the texts, only a few have been willing to try and learn this traditional Cetra medicine or TCM. Actually, there have been some pockets of the population using similar practices already, but we have yet to document this.</p><p>This TCM may be able to explain why the rains and water from the church in the ruins of Sector 5 were able to heal Geostigma. So we are offering scholarships for those who want to learn and to be able to practice in communities that need it the most. We need all the help we can get, since as you can see, the modern health medical system and knowledge are not working…at least for Geostigma.”</p><p>
  <em>This is it! An opportunity!</em>
</p><p>“You don’t have to be knowledgeable in medicine or in the ancient Centra language,” he assured her. “We’ll be supporting your training up until you can practice on your own. If you wish, WRO can temporarily hire someone else to take over Seventh Heaven. That is, if Cloud and Barret agrees.”</p><p><em>It wouldn’t matter anymore. It would be on her own terms.</em> Yet her motherly instinct kicked in. “How about Denzel and Marlene?”</p><p>“They can come with you. We’ll cover the costs of their education as well. And of course, we’re providing you with a living allowance and accommodation.”</p><p>
  <em>Maybe it is possible that she didn’t have to go on this journey alone. </em>
</p><p>“You don’t have to give your answer now –”</p><p>“I’m in,” she confirmed immediately. Barret raised a brow and mouthed a <em>what? </em></p><p>“I – I would still have to talk to the kids about it though. Where to?”</p><p>If her sudden response caught Reeve off-guard, his voice didn’t show. “We’ve set up three training centers and clinics in each major continent: Kalm, Cosmo Canyon, and Icicle Inn. You may choose whichever center you’d like to be part of, although Kalm would be the nearest to you.”</p><p>“Okay.”</p><p>“Let us know within the week so we can prepare the logistics and meet you here in Kalm for a thorough discussion on the terms of reference before you start. You’ll be joining a few scholars as well.”</p><p>She fidgeted. “Ah, yes. About that, I’m not sure I’m fit to travel as of the moment.”</p><p>“Why? Are you alright?”</p><p>“I got into an accident a week ago and I’m recovering from a sprained ankle,” she sheepishly explained. “We’ve got no cure materia on hand.”</p><p>A bit of silence and Reeve got an idea to solve her predicament. “I have an even better proposition: come to Kalm at the soonest possible time so you can experience TCM first-hand; it may be able to speed up your recovery.”<em> Even better than materia or painkillers?</em> “Then you may decide if you wish to pursue further studies and commit yourself to the program.”</p><p>“Okay.”</p><p>“And Tifa?”</p><p>“Yes?”</p><p>“We’re looking forward to having you onboard the WRO.”</p>
<hr/><p>The original plan was that both of the children would attend the new school that was opening soon in Edge, but that wasn’t possible if there was no left to take care of them in the city. So when Tifa informed them that she was leaving for Kalm, she saw fear in their eyes.</p><p>“Why? Don’t you love us anymore? Don’t you love Cloud anymore?”</p><p>“My friends are here. This is our home. I don’t want to move.”</p><p>It had been far easier to explain this to Barret. Their barrage of questions made her question her willingness and confidence in her decision, but there was no going back. She couldn’t move on here but as much as she wanted for them to be together, she didn’t want them to feel pressured to come with her.</p><p>“It’s not that I don’t love you.  I just need some time away…to fix a broken part of myself. Like…like this sprain. If I keep on moving and walking, it will take me longer to get better and get back up on my feet. Only I can heal it. But that doesn’t mean you can’t help.” She gave them a choice. “You can come with me to Kalm or you can go to Corel with Barret.” It twisted her heart to think of their separation.</p><p>“No! I want to stay here! I want to be here when Cloud comes home,” Denzel slammed his hand on the table and stormed the way up to his room, leaving Tifa and Marlene in the kitchen. Marlene, in tears, placed her hand over Tifa’s and repeated a question she had asked not too long ago.</p><p>“You still feel lonely even with us here, don’t you?” She knew and felt too much for her age.</p><p>“I’m sorry, Marlene,” Tifa replied again. “I try not to, but there’s so much…here.”</p><p>“Then…can I stay with you until you don’t feel lonely anymore? I don’t want to be left behind…”</p><p>She laughed through her tears and hugged Marlene.</p><p>“I would never leave you behind. Not ever.”</p><p>“I don’t think Daddy would mind anyway. But I’ll go talk to Denzel, see if he wants to come. After all, we’re family, right?”</p><p>“Yes, we’re family.”</p><p><em>Leaving was easier than staying</em>, Tifa realized as she finally secured her seatbelt in the passenger seat of the Barret’s truck and stowed her retractable crutches to the side. It only took a few days to prepare: Johnny would be temporarily in-charge of the bar, a responsibility he received with much enthusiasm and adoration, and he promised that Cloud’s office would still be accessible if ever he dropped by Edge. She had made calls to her suppliers and loyal customers regarding changes in management of the bar and the delivery service, informing them she would keep still keep in touch. A lot of them were sad to hear her leave and a few asked questions about who would take care of the children and what was she going to do, but she just let them know she’d be back.</p><p>So there they were, with Denzel sulking in the back and Marlene next to him, fiddling with the straps of her bag and humming a tune.</p><p>Barret fiddled with the car radio and settled on a song before shouting to the kids, “Ready?”</p><p>“Ready!”</p><p>Tifa pulled out her PHS. She wanted to call but decided against it, and instead chose to send one final text message to the only person who had yet to know.</p><p>✆<em><span class="u">Tifa:</span> Cloud, we’re moving to Kalm. Johnny took over 7<sup>th</sup> Heaven, but your office is still here in Edge if you need it. Going to work with WRO and see how that turns out. Let me know if you need anything, I’m just a text/call away. </em></p><p>When they reached the outskirts of Edge leading to the highway, her phone beeped with a message.</p><p>✆<em><span class="u">Cloud:</span> OK. Take care always, Tifa. Say hi to Denzel and Marlene for me.</em></p><p> </p><p>The radio crooned a bittersweet song to start their journey:</p><p>♫ ♫    How you even thought it could be right?</p><p>‘Cause everything we cherished is gone.</p><p>And in the end can you tell me if</p><p>it was worth the try, so I can decide…     ♫ ♫</p>
<hr/><p>Upon their arrival in Kalm, the first order of business was to visit Elmyra. Marlene couldn’t hold her excitement at seeing her after so long and was looking forward to telling stories about their life and recent adventure in Edge. A lot had changed since their last visit. Only a few months ago, many people littered the streets as normal houses and commercial establishments tried to accommodate the influx of refugees from Midgar, but now the streets were free of people and several buildings were newly constructed or in the process of construction. It looked like everyone’s cooperation to rebuilding the world was starting to pay off.</p><p>Tifa, Barret, Denzel, and Marlene had only just stepped into the comfort of Elmyra’s home and exchanged hugs and pleasantries when a WRO volunteer knocked on the door and offered to escort Tifa to the newly established TCM clinic in the outskirts of the town.</p><p>“I’m sorry, but I’ll catch up with you later, Elmyra,” she scooped the older woman into a one-arm hug and kissed her cheek. “I need to get this foot checked out. You two, behave,” she shot a stern but playful look at Denzel and Marlene.</p><p>The WRO volunteer carefully maneuvered the motorbike and sidecar through the streets to avoid jarring Tifa and her injured foot. Throughout the whole duration of the trip, she felt anxious and nervous. The last time she had been at a health care facility was when she had taken care of a vegetative Cloud afflicted with Mako poisoning. She could remember the overwhelming smell of disinfectants on the white beds and sheets in harsh contrast with the musty smell of the wooden walls and floors. The white uniforms of the doctor and nurse who took pity on her and tried to help. She prayed to Minerva that she wouldn’t have to be reminded.</p><p>It was only when they arrived did she release a sigh of relief. When they arrived at the facility, a large homey residential building, they were greeted by a nurse donning beige scrubs with the WRO logo embroidered on the breast pocket. “Hi Alesia here,” she said. “Would you like some assistance?” and offered Tifa a hand in getting out of the vehicle. Once sure that she was standing and properly supported by her crutches, she properly welcomed Tifa as they walked slowly towards the entrance.</p><p>“You must be Tifa Lockhart. So happy to finally meet you.”</p><p> As they entered the lobby, she noted the different scrolls framed and displayed on the wooden walls in an ancient manuscript and language. Soft, music played by a woodwind instrument could be heard in the background of a room that would look like a large living room had it not been for the triage desk in the middle. A very distinct smell of smoke also seemed to be wafting from one of the rooms. It didn’t smell like tobacco, but it was an earthy, herbal, and woody scent that Tifa couldn’t quite identify.</p><p>“Welcome! This TCM clinic has only been open for the past six months. In the first month, we had a bit of a slow start introducing it to people but when word got out that there was an alternative treatment available for Geostigma – we were overwhelmed by the number of people who wanted to try it!”</p><p>Only a mother and her child were waiting in the lobby. Only the child, with her hand heavily bandaged, curiously looked at Tifa.</p><p>Alesia continued, “Fewer patients come in nowadays ever since the Healing Rains, but most of them coming in to maintain their treatment. There’s been only one TCM practitioner available to treat patients and we’re hoping she can have an apprentice soon…”</p><p>They arrived at the triage desk. A small, wooden body model was displayed on the countertop, lines of red and blue traversing vertically from head to toe – some parallel and some in intersecting each other – with distinct points along the lines. Like a map of rivers and streams. <em>What is this type of treatment? </em></p><p>“Ms. Lockhart, please sit down and fill this form up. Once you’re done, Maester Yuna will be with you shortly.” <em>Maester? </em>Alesia explained, "We’re avoiding the use of ‘Doctor’ or ‘Professor’ because people don’t have good memories associated with our…<em>colleagues</em>…working in the hospitals or who have worked in former Shinra health facilities and labs. Seems to take away the fear, especially for the children.” She perked up. “But Maester has a good sound to it, eh? Like a teacher. Someone you can trust.”</p><p><em>Interesting. </em>She thanked Alesia for helping her settle down in a nearby chair and set out to accomplish the form. Some of the information had been easy to fill up, but others like surgery and family history had her mind blank. There was another blank sheet attached to the intake form, with some sections that puzzled her: a blank outline of a tongue and a front and back view of a body, a section with only “Ten Questions” as the header, and a section on “Systems of Medicine Applied”. Under the last section, four options were displayed under “Traditional Cetra Medicine” and one caught her attention: “acupuncture”. <em>Puncture…would that mean needles? </em></p><p>When she turned to ask Alesia, the nurse merely smiled at her and reached out for the form. “Are you finished? If you have any questions, I think Maester Yuna would be able to explain everything. Please, come this way.”</p><p>Slowly, they made their way into the adjoining room at the back. A beautiful young woman around Tifa’s age with shoulder-length brunette hair, sporting a unique blue-beaded earring on her right ear, turned in her seat to welcome them. She wore a sleeveless white kimono held together by a yellow-patterned obi in the middle. If Tifa hadn’t known better, her regal and refined appearance looked like she could summon an ally from the depths of the earth anytime.</p><p>Two mismatching eyes of green and blue smiled at her and Maester Yuna stood up and bowed slightly. “Ms. Lockhart, is it an honor. Reeve has told us to expect you.”</p><p>Tifa waved her hand, embarrassed at the formalities, but welcoming of her warmth. “Please, Maester Yuna. You can just call me Tifa. It’s nice to meet you.”</p><p>“Likewise, please call me Yuna. What can I help you with?”</p><p>The interview started off light, with Yuna asking the typical questions related to her injury – how long it had been, why she had sprained her ankle, what did she do, and what medicine she was taking. But Tifa was then subject to a different set of questions about Tifa’s physical health that didn’t seem to be related to her sprain.</p><p>“Tifa, I will now ask you some routine questions that you may find odd but it will be important for me to help diagnose and treat you. Let me know if you’re uncomfortable in answering any question.”</p><p>It was indeed odd. Personal questions like her temperature and feeling of chills or fever; abnormal sweating; pain or problems with the head, face, abdomen (<em>“Yes, my neck and shoulders have been aching a lot these days...sometimes I feel bloated as well.”) </em>and limbs; urine and bowel movement (<em>“Don’t go regularly, sometimes every other day.”</em>); thirst, appetite, and taste; sleep <em>(“I often go to sleep at around 1 to 3 in the morning.</em>”); and her menstrual period <em>(“They haven’t been regular since a year ago.”)</em>. After awkwardly answering questions about the menstrual flow, blood color, and presence of clots, curiosity got the better of her.</p><p>“Excuse me, Yuna, but why is it important for you to know about these things? I mean, wouldn’t it be easier to just treat the sprain?” <em>Gods, the question sounds so stupid.</em></p><p>Yuna paused from writing on the intake form and smiled. “Please accept my apologies, Tifa. I haven’t fully explained to you what TCM is.” She put down her pen and looked out the window thoughtfully. “As you have experienced and as others who are afflicted with illness or trauma, there is no symptom or disease whose effects are confined to only one part of the body. Like your sprain, your entire body has been affected by your ankle’s altered condition. Your mobility will be impaired, the way you walk will change, and even the way you sleep at night will be different. So if you focus and isolate on one aspect – both in treatment and diagnosis – then you will not be able to heal the whole body. Ancient Cetran texts saw the body as an organic and holistic whole, similar to how the Planet works.”</p><p>Tifa indicated her understanding by nodding.</p><p>“The theoretical foundation of TCM is that the body is a microcosm of the Planet as we emanate and return to it upon death. In this way, you can think of the body like a river, similar to the way the lifestream ebbs and flows. The health of the river depends on the natural flow and clarity of the water. When nature takes it course, rain falls on the hills and smoothly flows into the rivulets and streams that gradually filter into the river. But if there is a problem – a drought, a blockage, contamination along the way – the river won’t flow the way it is supposed to.”</p><p>
  <em>Like how the overuse of Mako drained and affected the spirit energy of the Planet. </em>
</p><p>“So based on our current knowledge and interpretation of the remaining texts of the Ancients, TCM is designed to restore the health and harmony of the entire system – be it through seeding the necessary clouds to release the needed rain, dredging or removing blocked passages so that water can flow, or expelling any form of contamination or pathogen.”</p><p>
  <em>Like Geostigma as a contamination of Jenova. </em>
</p><p>“I know it’s a lot to take it, but I think we have a lot to learn from the Ancients as the original stewards of the Planet,” Yuna said. “We can only be interpreters and doers, a medium through which we can heal people. I hope I answered your question well, Tifa.”</p><p>“Actually, you did…but I have even more questions.”</p><p>Yuna looked happy. “I am glad. But I think you’d even be more interested once you experience it yourself. She glanced down the chart. “Just a few more questions then I will check your pulse and tongue as part of the diagnostics. If you don’t mind, I’ll explain the treatment process later.”</p><p>“So, we aren’t talking about…just a sprained ankle, isn’t it?”</p><p>Yuna tilted her head to the side and smiled knowingly, reminding Tifa so much of Aerith. “Hmmm…it’s so much more.” She reached over and placed her hand over Tifa’s. “As humans, we tend to think we’re the powerful species, but we forget we’re just as weak and susceptible as any other living organism. We can be afflicted with physical injury but we’re also vulnerable to internal injury – from what we consume, from how we act, and even from what we feel. I can’t explain it all today because it took me years – even up until now – to really get it, but I guess the complexity makes us all the more human.”</p><p>Tifa could feel her emotion, all brimming to the surface, mixing with the overwhelming process of trying to take in what Yuna was saying.</p><p>“So tell me, how have you been feeling?”</p><p>All of the worry, frustration, feelings of worthlessness and guilt, sadness of the past months poured out without stopping as Yuna let her release every bit of emotion she had been holding. She hadn’t realized how much she’d been crying when she suddenly realized they must have spent around twenty minutes talking. Yuna had patted her hand and rubbing her shoulder in comfort and when she had nothing more to say, she stood up and hugged Tifa.</p><p>“I’m sorry. Was it too much?” she whispered in between sniffles when they released each other. “I guess…I haven’t gotten around to talk to any one since Meteorfall. I’m a mess. ” But the tightness and tension in her chest were slowly fading away.</p><p> “We’ve all been there. It’s normal to experience and feel after so much loss. Our feelings of hope, fear, anger, satisfaction, and frustration…it is only that we begin to process them, will we emerge stronger to make sense of how to move on. But that means also letting people in and interacting with others. And I’m happy you’ve opened up to me with so much trust.”</p><p> “I feel like…you’re an old friend. And I feel lighter. So thank you.” </p><p>A nod and an exchange of understanding. Alesia brought over a glass of water upon Yuna’s request.</p><p>“I’ll always be here if you need anyone to talk to.” Yuna went back to filling up the form. “Are you okay? If you’d like to rest, I can wait until you’re ready.”</p><p>“No, it’s okay. Go ahead.”</p><p>Using three fingers to take the pulse on each wrist, Tifa watched in fascination as Yuna concentrated and used gentle and stronger pressures to feel her pulse. After she wrote her findings (<em>“Wiry”</em>) she then asked Tifa to show her tongue, both above and under (“<em>Reddish sides, swollen with teeth marks, heat spots in heart”).</em></p><p>As Yuna continued to write, Tifa couldn’t help but glimpse at her diagnosis and took some time to read what it said upside down: “Liver qi stagnation, spleen qi deficiency, heat in the heart, trauma (ankle sprain)”. <em>What?</em></p><p>“Tifa, you remember I told you about making sure the river flows smoothly right? So aside from your injured ankle, we’re going to have to treat some blockages along the way. Based on your tongue, pulse, and other symptoms, it seems you have what we call liver qi stagnation and spleen qi deficiency.”</p><p>“Are those diseases? I mean, my liver and spleen have disease?”</p><p>“Oh, not quite. You see we’re talking about it in a different paradigm than what we’re used to. It’s hard to translate how the Cetra understood our body organs, but when we talk about major organs it’s not just the physical organs we’re talking about. It’s also their metaphysical and spiritual functions in the body. You see,” she stretched her hands out to either side, raised them over her head in a circle, and brought them to her chest – one over the other – forming a sphere. “…every living thing has a spirit, a mind, and a body. We tend to think that they’re separate but they are intertwined. Imbalances with any manifest in the other so you can say that physical state reflects and affects one’s mental, emotional, and spiritual state and vice versa. That being said, your liver and spleen may be normal if you consult a doctor or get lab or x-ray results, but TCM sees beyond what you can find using technology. After all, the Ancients didn’t have technology back then…only observations and interactions between and among species.”</p><p>Yuna pulled out a diagram of the human body from the drawer in her desk.</p><p>“For example, the liver has a lot of functions in TCM, much more than we’ve known. It can store blood but it is also the regulator that ensures that our energy, emotions, creative ideas and plans, run smoothly within ourselves. When we have emotional stress, our energy stagnates and causes blockages and problems in the system and the liver can’t help us regulate or process them as efficiently. And that causes problem in other organs as well that have important functions, like the spleen for digestion and the heart for the blood and spirit.”</p><p>“I don’t fully understand it but I think I get the gist.”</p><p>“I think it will all be clearer once you start studying TCM. But for now, we’re going to eliminate the stagnation, move your energy, and try to regain your natural balance through what we call acupuncture. We’ll be inserting needles to activate certain and stimulate points along meridians where energy travels through the body and in, between, and among the organs. We’ve got around 361 points on the body to be exact.”</p><p>Yuna retrieved a blister pack from the desk and held it up. “In the past, the Ancients used whittled stones and bones for acupuncture. There are books that also state that the early settlers of Costa Del Sol used fishing bones for acupuncture but it’s not clear if it is derived from the Ancients. Here, go ahead and look at it.”</p><p>Tifa took the pack of needles carefully and inspected them. Very fine, thin needles with a silver metal shaft and a handle made of a copper-colored metal. “Is this…?”</p><p>“Metal. Mythril to be exact and sourced here in Kalm. When the Elders in Cosmo Canyon shared their initial findings on acupuncture, Reeve was quick to obtain manufacturing equipment and plants from some donors, the same ones that were used to manufacturing the needles for injections. Some of the scientists got onboard to refine the process so we can come up with single-use sterile needles.”</p><p>Tifa swallowed. “Will it hurt?”</p><p>“Oh, maybe a prick, like a bite of an ant when going in, but shouldn’t feel anything but heavy once it’s in. Here, let me demonstrate.” She took Tifa’s hand and pressed a tender spot on muscle in between the pointer finger and the thumb. “It can be a bit sore like this, but shouldn’t be painful at all.”</p><p><em>Doesn’t sound too bad. </em>“And how long?”</p><p>“We’re going to have you strip down to your panties and then we’ll treat your back first. After fifteen minutes, we’ll remove the needles and have you lay on your back so we can treat the front and your foot. We’ll leave in the needles again for fifteen to twenty minutes. We’re also going to put some warming herbs on some of the needles so it’ll warm you up and stimulate your qi or energy. You may not like the smell, but trust me, it’ll help.”</p><p>“Okay.”</p><p>“Well, if you don’t have any more questions, let me know when we can start.”</p>
<hr/><p>Alesia led her to a larger room that had five massage beds lined up to another, similar to those she had seen in some spas back in Midgar, but separated by curtains. She settled on the side of one of the beds next to a wall and took her time to remove her dress and bra. She was very self-conscious particularly about exposing herself and the scar that ran down her chest, but the dim lights and being the only patient reassured her of some privacy. She called Alesia for guidance on how to lie down given her foot and comfortably settled on her right side, with a cotton blanket shielding her from the cold.</p><p>Light footsteps and the sound of the curtains being pushed aside and then drawn again. Yuna placed her hand on Tifa’s shoulder.</p><p>“Ready?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“I’ll be only exposing your back then I will be putting in ten needles. Also, just a standard question: you aren’t pregnant, are you?” The time of the month hadn’t come yet.</p><p>Tifa was glad she couldn’t see her lightly blush. “No.”</p><p>“Good. If you don’t mind, I’ll just be reciting the names of the points I’m needling so you can be familiar with hearing them. Mind you, there are 12 meridians are named after the organs they’re connected to so you may be confused. Let me just clean first.” Yuna folded the covers back to reveal only her shoulders and back. Cool cotton dampened with alcohol was swept on lines on her shoulders and along the spine.</p><p>“Okay.”</p><p>“Mend us,” she prayed, before continuing. “Gallbladder 21, <em>Jianjing</em>.” <em>What does the gallbladder have to do with it? </em>A palpation of the area between the neck and left shoulder, a slight prick, and then a very heavy sensation. “Feel it?”</p><p>“Yeah.”</p><p>“Good.” Other shoulder, same spot, same sensation. “I’m going to have to feel your ribs. Hope you aren’t too ticklish.”</p><p>She slid her hand underneath the area below the armpit and Tifa jerked away in response. “Sorry,” she muttered, blushing again. “Reflexes, I guess.”</p><p>“It’s okay.” A gentler touch and the hand moved away to locate the spine level to the rib she identified. “Got it.”</p><p>“Bladder 18, <em>Ganshu</em>.” Left, then right. “Bladder 47, <em>Hunmen.”</em></p><p>Another quick search of the ridge of her pelvic bone on the left, then a finger on the spine to mark the next set.</p><p>“Bladder 20, <em>Pishu…</em>and Bladder 23, S<em>henshu</em>.”</p><p>The last two points felt heavy. Yuna stimulated and twirled each one before leaving.</p><p>“Tifa, Alesia will attach and leave on moxa to burn in your lower back, so you should be able to feel its warmth but it shouldn’t be too hot. If you can, please avoid moving too much. Let us know if you need anything. Just relax.”</p><p>Tifa must have been very tired to have Alesia waking her up 15 minutes later with the needles already removed. The warmth on her lower back and spread down to her legs and upper back, while a wave of calmness made her relax. She momentarily forget about her sprain as she rolled on her back while Alesia adjusted the blanket to cover her modestly.</p><p>Yuna re-entered the room with a smile.</p><p>“How do you feel now?”</p><p>“Better than I have been for a long time. I still feel sleepy.”</p><p>“I am happy to hear that. Are you ready?”</p><p>“Yes.”</p><p>“Good. I’m starting with what we call the ‘Four Gates’ to really open up your meridians and let the qi and blood flow freely. This will be a bit sensitive. Liver 3, <em>Taichong.</em>” She moved down to her feet to apply alcohol. Coolness, a sting, and then a large current of electricity travelled across the foot before settling into a sore, heavy sensation. Tifa gasped.</p><p>“Is it supposed to feel that way?”</p><p>“Yeah. It’s a pretty strong point. It’ll kickstart things to help everything moving.”</p><p>Yuna continued and focused on the hands. “Large intestine 4, <em>Hegu</em>.” Tifa’s fingers twitched at the stimulation.</p><p>She then made quick work of the points that followed.</p><p>Two on the head: “Gallbladder 13, <em>Benshen.</em>”</p><p>Three on the stomach: “<em>Ren </em>4, <em>Guanyuan</em>. Stomach 25, <em>Tianshu.</em>”</p><p> Another pair at the hands: “Pericardium 6<em>, Neiguan.” </em></p><p>Back down to the legs and feet: “Stomach 36, <em>Zusanli</em>.” <em>Gods. </em>Tifa almost sat up as the electric currents that ran down her leg upon insertion was stronger and produced a different feeling in her stomach, but it disappeared as fast as it had come and its heaviness mobilized her legs. “Why does it do that?”</p><p>“Spleen 6, <em>Sanyinjiao</em>.” Yuna finished inserting the needle.</p><p>“Simply put, it’s a strong point. Warriors used to needle this point every day to help stimulate their immune system because it’s where a lot of energy gathers. Legend has it that the name itself, which means ‘three mile leg’, was named that way because they could needle it and be able to walk after for another three more miles even if they were tired.”</p><p>She then moved onto the injured ankle, searched for tender spots and needled them. “<em>Ashi</em>.”</p><p>The last one on the left ankle: “Kidney 3, <em>Taixi</em>.”</p><p>Alesia came in to attach the same herb on the needles on the legs and the right ankle, putting in sheets of foil underneath each one before lighting them. “We’ll just be right outside if you need anything. You’ll be alright.” Tifa smiled and left the room with Alesia.</p><p>As Tifa watched the tendrils of smoke waft up towards the ceiling, she wished that it could also bring with it all her worries, fears, and bad memories - going up, up, up until they disappeared and faded away into nothingness. Her eyes trailed the path of the smoke up to the ceiling, and it was then that she noticed a framed painting hung on the adjacent wall to her right: a beautiful picture of yellow daffodils in bloom.</p><p>
  <em>Yes, she will be alright. </em>
</p><p>
  <em>All will be alright in time.</em>
</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Author’s Notes: I have to admit, this work was initially borne out of selfish reasons. I stopped clinical internship and practice in acupuncture for a few months because of quarantine measures, but they resumed lately (virtually) and I had to go back and review the books. I was so tearfully bored of reading the same lines over and over again and as I have poor photographic memory, I needed a way to creatively help me in the process of re-learning again. What really got me writing was when we were discussing the psyche – think mind, spirit, body – in relation to a case study on depression, and my mind immediately jumped to our beloved characters in FFVII. I don’t think any normal person would have gone through so much without being broken in many aspects and for someone like Tifa to go through life and take care of others without being affected seems superhuman (maybe she is). Advent Children brought up a glimpse of how clinical depression looks like through Cloud, who went through a lot of loss and grief, but it takes on many forms and has many causes and patterns in TCM. On a serious note, acupuncture alone won’t solve deep-seated emotional and mental conditions and is recommended to be done alongside modern medicine, like with other diseases.<br/>Moving on, the next chapter will focus on Tifa’s struggles outside her comfort zone as she goes on with her studies and practice, alongside her mother duties. The chapters after that will be lighter and tackle individual case studies of our favorite characters. What would their tongues and symptoms look like? And what will Tifa do to help them? </p><p>✽✽✽</p></blockquote></div></div>
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